One of the more demoralizing possibilities of a Trump presidency is that he may in fact be bullshitting everyone with his populist act. It’s worrisome that he’s tacking hard right on tax policy, and of course he has Pence along for the ride, a circumstance more credibly explained by conspiracy theories featuring back-of-the-house operatives in the Republican Party than as the electoral strategy personally chosen by a populist candidate notorious for clashing with practically everyone around him.
On the other hand, Trump continues to upset an amazingly comprehensive rogues’ gallery of proven bad actors in American politics. I do not relish the duty of telling my parents and affluent, educated friends that Clinton has been scoring endorsements from so many neoconservative shitheads and meddlesome billionaires not because Trump is too extreme even for them but because Clinton is the more reactionary candidate, while Trump is the left-liberal. That’s the sense I increasingly get about these campaigns, to the extent that I can make any sense of them. Both, of course, are bizarre. Trump has put the Democratic Party’s Brahmin base into such a frothing state of pique that voters who claim to support socialistic policies are siding with Michael Bloomberg, the technocratic billionaire soda scold who thinks that having more money than his subjects gives him better judgment than they have, and that he has no duty to try to keep his police from murdering people for selling loosies in a black market for cigarettes that his own health nut extremism created by distorting the market for taxable cigarettes beyond recognition. We have avowed pacifists siding with generals who thunder like Mussolini from the dais about how Trump, consistently the less confrontational candidate on military policy, is a threat to national security and Clinton, the one who badgered Barack Obama to take a harder line on Libya and then carried on in public like a running back doing a touchdown dance at the news of his summary execution, will keep the nation safe. We have these same supposedly antiwar partisans bragging about the #ImWithHer endorsements from neocon policy shop catamites like Max Boot. I saw Boot and Masha Gessen on some panel with Fareed Zakaria the other day, and the physiognomy was interesting. There are quite a few inbred-looking motherfuckers in policy circles. I’ve always thought that Megan McArdle, despite her strong Celtic features and her being (((one of them))) by affiliation, not blood, also looks like their concelebrant in the Most Consanguineous High Priesthood of Muhjizzidik. At least when the breeders in Kiryas Joel pump out retards, theirs tend to stay out of policy.
Come to think of it, the ethnic angle here is worth examining in a bit more detail. These asswipes are leading us into hardcore shanda territory. Although I’m not a Jew per se, I’m Jewish enough to suffer antisemitic reactions in a society that is actually antisemitic (the US today, mercifully, is not to any significant extent, as far as I can tell). I’m not running gentile Dolezal game on y’all, now. I’m dead serious. The neocon shitflock, being very heavily Jewish in a host society that isn’t even a tenth Jewish (or a quarter Jewish, to use more liberal figures from the fashionable parts of the Northeast that vomit up so many policy dipshits), are an abiding wellspring of antisemitism. God help us if the goyim construe this relationship in ethnic terms and hold guilty on account of our bloodlines others of us who have no truck with these bloodthirsty armchair colonels, and who also do not have dual Israeli citizenship and the resources to hop the next flight to Tel Aviv should shit seriously go down in the springtime for Hitler tradition. I am completely in the right to kikesplain this shit to the rotten branches of the tribe. My grandfather used to call my uncle, a self-loathing half-Jew, Kike Douglas. That was rude, but scrupulously pretending to respect the same foreign ethnicities whose butchery one is presently orchestrating as a sort of Risk LARP is just plain cold. It’s time for this shanda squad to cut out the Adolf Eichmann for Sheriff crap.
Put another way: “African-American engineering” is usually a slur, while “Some niggas hardly have anything to do with their kids” doesn’t have anything to do with race unless you’re Adria Richards. Big White Boy is surely against absentee and deadbeat fatherhood by David Duke’s beloved European-Americans, too. I’m actually going somewhere with this, against the odds. This scrupulosity about woke-ass safe zone racial and ethnic terminology on the part of people who would shit bricks if they had to move to neighborhood that was not safely haut bourgeois or better, ESPECIALLY one with a large nonwhite population, is obnoxious and insidious. It encourages reactionary dipshits to use racially inflammatory language just to transgress against these tone police, and it falsely absolves the tone police themselves of stupefying levels of bigotry that they’re cultured enough to keep barely within the bounds of polite discourse.
To simplify the politics a bit, although not awfully much, Hillary is the latter’s standard bearer. In Maine politics, I’ve learned, I’d get into trouble for referring to what I traditionally do to Kwesi Millington around here, instead of Eichmann for once, as extreme Canucksploitation because it’s insensitive to refer to Canadians as Canucks. The insensitivity of thoughtlessly throwing Libya into civil war by getting its colonel battered with his own original recipe and dipped in the martyr sauce or encouraging a vicious proxy government to pulverize Yemen is left conveniently unaddressed. One says nice politic things about these people while destroying them, you see.
For this reason alone, Trump looks better than Clinton as a prospect for transparent government. We’re bound to get dunked in the shit as a polity by whichever of these two makes the cut, but with Trump we’ll get a more honest play-by-play of what’s being done to us. The sheer blatant excess of it will make it easier to identify and resist. Trump’s polarizing effect, stronger than Clinton’s, and his habit of clashing with all the losers who oppose him instead of being his magnificent supporters, will make it harder for him to manipulate Congress than it would be for a former senator who scrupulously plays sorta kinda by the rules when she isn’t setting up guerrilla e-mail servers and operating a nonprofit foundation for the purpose of laundering bribes that foreign governments paid her household to influence her decisions as Secretary of State.
The decision we’re facing is rather like the decision to hand the premiership either to–let’s use full legal names this time, why don’t we, since that’s the tradition for serial murderers–Robert William Pickton or David Russell Williams. By God, give it to the guy with the shitty pig farm, not the guy with CFB Trenton, even if Sick Willie would look even worse in your wife’s underwear. Okay, that wasn’t entirely fair; Clinton has been involved in remorseless wholesale international butchery, and Trump has not. Hell, even our RCM Buddy/Guy RC friend Kwesi Sekou Millington isn’t such a slick dissembler, and he claims to be running his own communications firm. If he were a serial murderer, I wouldn’t have had to learn his full name from his Twitter handle and that he has gone into a business that should embarrass any soldier of the law just as much as the old soldier Ike was embarrassed to do stupid campaign commercials about Mamie’s thoughts on the price of milk. And we’re still only up to two or three out of seven in this paragraph not being psychopathic, definitely including the killer Redcoat and possibly including the loudmouth with the elegant hair.
Maybe Trump is a shabbos goy for Shandamax Adelson. It’s all too plausible. Clinton, on the other hand, is so obviously in bed with so many different nation-wrecking shitheads, including her crowd’s own class of officer-class shabbos goyim. You know, Our Highlanders. Jim Webb’s people, but the ones who sold their principles. We really should stop publicly fellating our military personnel for the mutual feels, especially when our armed forces are being roped into dead man’s errands like NATO revanchism in Ukraine and their flag officers keep selling out either to the blow-everything-up think tanks or to Fat Leonard. C. S. Lewis comes through on the superiority of robber barons to moral busybodies yet again. We may have a choice between either crooked and disturbed or merely crooked. These asswipes in the neocon think tanks enjoy telling the little people what to do, but if cutting sugarcane paid better, they’d be cutting some damn cane.
In the midst of all this, Melania Trump has gotten the erstwhile liberals into another snit, this time by being accused of illegally working as a model on a tourist visa. It’s quite fitting that her name is an anagram for “AM ALIEN,” as she is one, technicalities of citizenship be damned. One of NPR’s law profs on speed dial had some comments about how Melania could still have gotten into trouble for working unpaid, for the “exposure,” on a tourist visa, although at this point the only people she’ll realistically get into trouble with are scolds from her husband’s opposition.
This scandal should remind us all of the unfortunate truth that our current alternative to having a hellishly corrupt ex-president as first gentleman is to have a dumb-as-a-doorpost former model as first lady. Like noted rent control bae and black Lorax Jimmy McMillan, Melania Trump was once a sex worker. McMillan’s position, I’m assuming, is that the rent was too damn high to stay off the pole. It’s safe to say that Melania holds herself above mere whores, just as she holds herself above immigrants who don’t have the funds to do R. Allen Stanford-style purchases of lawful presence in the US by flying back to Slovenia quarterly, and that her thoughts on working for the USPS would be, “Oh my god so many postal codes.” I can’t entirely figure out why strippers, massage whores, and full-service escorts consistently seem so much more intelligent than models, but I have some ideas. Most of them have the good sense to demand compensation for their services. They don’t offer free massages or strip teases for “exposure.” That would be like running a Denny’s where freeloaders are given free meals as long as they promise to tell their friends about how good the food was. They also seem to need much better social skills than models, either some form of bedside manner or a sense of live showmanship. Massage tends to require some additional technique and expertise, unless it’s done exclusively as an amateurish form of foreplay.
Modeling, from what I can tell, mainly involves doing what some dirtbag with a camera says. In theory, it involves more skill than what most of its practitioners ever show in public. In practice, it’s done by the sort of women who, as First Lady, will preside over “so many charities” “for the children. They are our future.” These are women who agree to put freebies on deposit in some skeevy bastard’s spank bank. Many of them sex their photographers in the hope of quid pro quo career advancement, too. They’re whores who forget the part of whoring that involves demanding and receiving payment for services rendered. That due payment could be a candy bar for the San Jose downtowner who doesn’t mind sex, enjoys candy, and can’t do second-grade arithmetic, but as retarded as that is, it’s still more coherent than working for free on the expectation that someone else will pay for additional services sometime later.
If you look at the sort of women who do modeling, though, you may notice that it’s largely the sort of cute, peppy women who assume that the rules shouldn’t apply to themselves because they’re pretty. Never mind that these rules include norms that are in place to protect them against exploitation by dirtbags with artistic shtick. These women are gullible and vapid enough to believe that the industry takes care of its talent out of some kind of ultimate karmic goodness of heart, not because SAG will go out on strike again. They believe this even as they submit to casting couch extortion in the hope that they, too, will be able to, as Los Angeles video star Mark Fuhrman put it, suck and fuck their way to the top. (Furhman, for his part, sucked and fucked up so badly at his day job that he now communes with Whitey in Northern Idaho, no matter how much basketball he used to play with other detectives, some of whom were black people. He got a Fox News gig out of the deal, though.)
Fuhrman wouldn’t have to salaciously imagine that Melania Trump sucked and fucked her way to the top. She’s no police captain. She can hardly command her own mind, let alone a patrol district. The Trump marriage, like most Trump marriages, is a sugaring relationship, and come November, Donald and Melania may get to move into the best public housing Mama Sugar herself has to offer. Giving that bimbo and her vulgarian of a husband an A-List bully pulpit would suck, but the realistic alternative sucks, too. It sucks ass. It will continue to suck ass. All we can do now is try to make it suck ass overtly for the next four years, so we aren’t deceived about what’s being done to us.